Risk

RISKS

To laugh is to risk appearing the fool,
To weep is to risk being called sentimental.
To reach out to another is to risk involvement.
To expose feelings is to risk showing your true self.
To place your ideas and your dreams before the crowd is to risk being called naive.
To love is to risk not being loved in return,
To live is to risk dying,
To hope is to risk despair,
To try is to risk failure

But risks must be taken, because the greatest risk in life is to risk nothing.
The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing, and becomes nothing.
He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn, feel, change, grow or love.
Chained by his certitude, he is a slave; he has forfeited his freedom.
Only the person who risks is truly free.

the real author of this inspirational verse is Janet Rand.

Special support

When I feel like i'm a nobody, When I feel down, When I'm stressed out, When I don't know who to turn to, When I feel like im not worth it, When I feel like crying, When I feel like im falling down, When I tell myself that I am never enough..

They prove me otherwise & they help me get through everything .

Allah SWT

Hanis Nabiha

Nicole Chan

Faiz Hafiy

Iqbal Had

Noor Ashiqin

Ahmad Danial Naim

*not ranking anyone*

Thanks, for this,

Nicole : I've got your back sis

Faiz: If u cry and i was in front of you. I'll give u a hug just to make you feel better.

Me: And i'd cry lagi teruk. Haha

Faiz: Then i'll just keep hugging. Haha

*faints*

Me: what does it mean if after a workout session then u pening2 wanna muntah and all?

Him: Period

Me: -.-" If dh hbs?

Him: start a new one! :D

Me: I think i boleh semput ckp dgn you -.-"

Him: haha k la jk jk.

Me: *heart attack, faints*

You are a comedian. PERIOD!

Feels good :)

The best thing about crying is that it makes you sleepy afterwards. Alhamdulillah! :)

Sesungguhnya Allah memiliki sejumlah malaikat yang tugasnya hanya

berkeliling di jalan-jalan untuk mencari tempat-tempat bagi orang-orang yang berzikir. Dan

jika mereka melihat ada sekelompok orang yang berzikir, maka mereka memanggil kawankawanya untuk mendatangai tempat itu. Maka Para malaikat turun ke langit dunia dengan

menaungi majlis zikir itu dengan sayap-sayap mereka. Sekembalinya, mereka ditanya oleh

Tuhan mereka padahal Dia Maha Mengetahui lebih dari mereka.

Tanya Allah :Apa yang diucapkan oleh hamba-hambaKu Itu?

Jawab para malaikat : Mereka sedang bertasbih,bertakbir, bertahmid dan bertamjid

untukMu.

Tanya Allah : Apakah mereka pernah melihatAku?

Jawab para malaikat : ì Mereka belum pernah melihatMu.

Tanya Allah : Bagaimanakah kalau mereka pernah melihatKu.?

Jawab para malaikat : Kalau mereka pernah melihatMu,pasti mereka akan bertambah

banyak memujiMu.

Tanya Allah : Apa yang mereka minta?

Jawab para malaikat : Mereka meminta dimasukkan kedalam surgaMu.

Tanya Allah : Apakah mereka pernah melihat surgaKu?

Jawab para malaikat : ìMereka belum pernah melihatnya.

Tanya Allah : Bagaimana kalau mereka pernah melihatnya?

Jawab para malaikat : Jika mereka pernah melihatnya tentu mereka akan lebih banyak

memintanya.

Tanya Allah : Dari apa mereka mohon perlindungan?

Jawab para malaikat : Mereka mohon perlindungan dari siksa api neraka.

Tanya Allah : Apakah mereka pernah melihatnya?

Jawab pada malaikat : Mereka belum pernah melihatnya.

Tanya Allah : Bagaimana kalau mereka pernah melihatnya?

Jawab para malaikat : Jika mereka pernah melihatnya,pasti mereka akan lebih banyak

mohon perlindungan daripadanya.

Kata Allah : Ketahuilah dan saksikanlah bahwa Aku telah memberi ampunan kepada

mereka.

Kata seorang dari para malaikat : Di antara mereka ada seorang yang tidak ikut berzikir, ia

datang kerana ada suatu hajat.

Kata Allah : Orang-orang itu tidak akan membawa sengsara kepada kawan duduknya.

(HR Tirmidzi, Ahmad, Al Baihaqi dan Ibnu Syahin)

Addicto

I am officially addicted to hindustan movies!

THIS IS ALL BECAUSE OF YOUUUU *soulja boy*

Emotional

Ya Allah, why do I cry everytime I remember you? I feel your power, I feel your kindness.

I was lost. I did not know that being close to you was so important. But now I realized what I was missing.

Forgive me for all my sins, forgive me for all my bad intentions, and my arrogance.

Ya Allah, Ya tuhanku. Open my heart wider to you.

I thank you for every breath that I take. I thank you for everyday. I thank you for the chances that you have given me.

Alhamdulillah.

Left behind

I think I have to train myself to be a reader. People these days have such advanced and bombastic english and I just feel like i don't know anything. It gets really difficult especially when I need to express my feelings, but words can't be formed to actually reflect exactly on how I feel. But that is not the only reason why I feel like im left behind. You can obviously gain knowledge by reading. And I think people in this world are all racing for that. I just wanna do it sincerely. For Allah. I have to start seeing it as something important. I have to make sure that my intentions are pure. I don't just wanna gain knowledge because I wanna be successful or to be respected. I don't wanna be arrogant. Im scared.

" IKHLAS NIAT – Kewajipan ke atas setiap muslim di dalam memastikan niat ketika menuntut ilmu ikhlas kerana Allah dan bukannya untuk mencari habuan dunia yang sementara kerana Rasulullah S.A.W pernah memberi amaran yang mana Allah akan menyediakan tempat di dalam neraka bagi mereka yang menuntut ilmu untuk kesenangan dunia semata-mata tanpa memikirkan maslahat Islam dan ummatnya. Memang agak susah untuk ikhlas di dalam belajar tetapi kita mesti terus berusaha ke arahnya. Kita yang berada dalam sistem sekular yang mementingkan material menyebabkan kita terlupa bahawa ilmu yang dipelajari bukan untuk mendapatkan tempat dan kedudukan serta kerja tetapi adalah untuk menjauhkan kita daripada kejahilan yang mana dengan ini mampu menjadi perisai diri di dalam melawan arus kesesatan dan seterusnya membawa perubahan kepada keislaman. Jadikanlah diri kita sebagaimana padi yang mana semakin semakin berisi semakin tunduk ke bumi kerana rendah diri. Jangan jadi sebagaimana lalang yang tinggi semakin mendongak ke langit kerana sombong. Ingatlah bahawa orang yang benar ikhlas dalam menuntut ilmu sahaja yang mampu memiliki sifat terpuji termasuk merendah diri. Maksud firman Allah dalam ayat 235 surah al-Baqarah :.........Dan ketahuilah bahawa Allah mengetahui apa yang tersemat dalam hatimu maka takutlah kepadaNya dan ketahuilah bahawa Allah Maha Pengampun lagi Maha Penyayang. Ingatlah bahawa setiap orang akan binasa melainkan orang yang berilmu, setiap orang yang berilmu akan binasa melainkan orang yang beramal dan setiap orang yang beramal akan binasa melainkan orang yang benar-benar ikhlas.

MEMILIH TEMAN YANG SOLEH - Pilihlah teman yang mampu membawa kita ke arah kebaikan dan cubalah hidupkan budaya nasihat menasihati antara satu sama lain di dalam rumah kita sendiri samada berbentuk rasmi seperti diskusi kitab atau melalui perbincangan yang tidak rasmi setiap hari.Loqman Al-Hakim pernah berpesan kepada anaknya supaya sentiasa bersama orang alim dan soleh serta menghadiri majlis ilmu kerana apabila Allah menurunkan keberkatan kita turut sama memperolehinya. Disamping itu apabila kita sentiasa bersama orang soleh akan menasihati kita ke arah kebaikan serta menegur kita apabila berlakunya kesilapan dan kesalahan. Ini kan mematangkan lagi diri kita disamping menambahkan lagi semangat kita dalam belajar. Ini bukan bermakna kita diminta menjauhi mereka yang tidak soleh sebaliknya kita diminta berdakwah kepada mereka setakat kemampuan yang ada dan jangan pula kita yang terpengaruh dengan cara hidup mereka. Ingatlah firman Allah dalam surah Al-Zukhruf ayat 67 yang bermaksud :Teman-teman yang rapat pada hari itu sebahagiannya menjadi musuh kepada sebahagian yang lain kecuali mereka yang bertaqwa. Rasulullah S.A.W pernah berpesan kepada kita melalui hadis yang diriwayatkan oleh imam Tarmizi dan Abu Daud : Seseorang itu mengikut agama sahabat temannya. Maka hendaklah seseorang itu memerhati siapakah yang dijadikan teman. "

Thank you to my friends that are always reminding me to be closer to Him. Esp to Hanis Nabiha :)

:O

SPM results set to be released on March 22

uh oh, haha. Saw this at star online and it was posted earlier today :)

Well it's kinda boring waiting for the results but hey at least it gives me more time to chill. Bcause the life of a college student is more than hectic. So i guess it's a win/win situation.

YOUUU!

Him: Wanna bet?

Me: what bet?

Him: I bet that I can text you goodmorning faster at 7am tmrrw than you can text me.

Me: HAHAH! exactly 7am or bfr? If exactly i cn do tht :P

Him: exactly, haha u can? really? mcm tk percaya je

Me: bring it on! I msg u goodmorning then tido balik :P HAHA

Him: Oh that was yr plan? My plan was tak bangun langsung, biar je :P

LIH.GSRKNFKLESNFLKSFNALKNF.AKLF YES YOUUU!

Secure or Not

A sense of security, it's something we all search for whether it's knowing you're desired, taking control of our fears, or finding strength to do the right thing.

Friends are forever

There are many things that bind friends together - Sharing a laugh over an embarrassing incident, comforting each other in times of need, finding it in our hearts to forgive. But, the thing that binds friends together the most is a secret that changes everything.

I love you guys.

Noor Ashiqin, Nicole Chan, Nahra Yasmin & Nur Aina

Progress

You opened my eyes. You make me believe that I am someone.

Cat's sense

I tried sleeping around 1am plus but I culdn't. I was having some problems before that and I just wanted to sleep and wake up to a new day. But I just culdn't. So I shut my eyes again and all of my problems kept swirling around in my mind. And this time, God sent me something more special :) My kitten. Usually my kitten would sleep on my study chair or maybe on my leg but this time, he came closer :)

I culdnt sleep so I logged into my twitter again, but I guess my kitten culd sleep better than I did esp on my warm shoulders.

This is the only time where he would take his long nap which is after midnight.

This was when I tried sleeping. My younger sister, Eimaan took a shot of this using the ipad. And showed me afterwards.

Yeap Kit Kat is still sleeping.

Before he slept, he just put his paws on my nose and licked it. I guess that was his way of saying "hey be strong, im here for you. *a few minutes later* ZzzzZZ" Hahaha.

I love my cats. All of them. <3

Hmm, I feel like cooking for the family. A big meal. I should do my grocery shopping soon. Night, going to bed now.

I keep forgetting

I keep forgetting. About myself. About how I should never please anyone else just to make them happy.

Sometimes im so blind and blur. Or maybe you could say tht im lost.

I've been so desperate in wanting "this type of thing" to work out that I forgot about the fact that I shuldn't just settle.

Ya Allah, you've been listening to my prayers. You have showed me signs. You have guided me. And I feel so blessed and grateful. Alhamdulillah.

I used to cry myself to sleep, thinking that I had no one. Thinking that I was alone. And I prayed & told god what I felt. So God gave me challenges and obstacles. I got occupied with it and had forgotten about how lonely I was. Alhamdulillah.

And when I faced with challenges and obstacles. I prayed again asking for signs, signs on whether the problem is going to work out or not. And you gave me plenty telling me that it wasn't going to work out. So all the hurt that was accumulated in me was gone. Why? Because I was busy trying to be strong. And God did not let me do that alone. So He sent my bestfriends to help me. My best friends who are always sincere in their intentions. Best friends that never failed in making me feel as if everything was going to be okay.

Everything happens for a reason. And sometimes I or we struggle in finding what the reasons are bcause we just want to stop the pain. When we did not realize that God has helped us in His way.

I thank god for everything that has happened.

Today

Today is just great, everything went well. I had fun and I finally culd spend time with the boys & Ash.

Went to klcc in the morning around 9.41am and met Iqbal at cold storage, I was shopping for some granola and energy bars, for me to bring to the gym and Iqbal was searching for his drink. So we walked around and sat at the food court, waiting for Faiz & Naim to come. Had a long talk with Iqbal while eating our breakfast then Faiz & Naim arrived. They joined us at foodcourt. As usual, the four of us would talk abt everything tht makes no sense to everything tht makes sense. From girls, boys to education & career. The last time we hang out was at faiz's place, around december. It's just great that I have guy friends that I can always count on. From making me feel okay to making me feel safe. Naim was doing his russian language homework, since he's russian tuisyen was at 6pm. He's tht hardworking! So he just ate a granola bar for breakfast. Thats the sacrifice u hv to make if u wanna go to russia and be a doctor ayy ;)

Faiz was looking for sports shoes so we all followed him to all the sports shop. And oh god he took a long time to make sure tht the shoe was a good one, bending it here and there. Then Faiz wanted to watch underworld awakening, so we bought 4 movie tickets in 3D. And in order, Faiz, I, Iqbal & Naim sat. Im lucky enough that I have the insane friend on my left and the sane one on my right. Iqbal would be the sane one :P But both of them were insane when it comes to popcorn. They kept forcing me to eat some! Since they knew i hated popcorn. Faiz ate the popcorn as if it was rice, -.-" He kept eating it non stop. And all the popcorn would spill out of his mouth -.-" And thts exactly wht he offered me.

The movie was so gory i became speechless. The guys kept laughing & Faiz kept checking & asking me if i was okay bcause i was trembling! & I culdnt stand all the gory blood stuff.

Anyways after the movie, I went to Sephora with them to buy my lipbalm & facial wash.

Iqbal wanted some mint so we went to candylicious. While Iqbal & I were looking around and playing the lolipop saber :P Naim & Faiz waited outside. A few minutes after that, Ashiqin & Malik came. So I took Ashiqin away from Malik & we said our goodbyes there :)

Right after Ashiqin arrived, my tummy was making noise & I knew I had to eat so we all went to charlie brown something restaurant to eat. Im not sure if the guys felt gay or whatsoever with the decorations and all but it was definitely an adorable place :)

I ordered fried tortilla chicken cutlet and caramel latte. While Ashiqin & Naim ordered bubble tea & mushroom soup with kiwi avocado juice respectively. I shared my chicken cutlet with Iqbal & Faiz cz it was a big serving!

Faiz got bored bcause Naim was doing his russian hw, I was talking to Ash & Iqbal was with his handphone. So he read my CLEO magazine tht i bought a few days ago.

After finishing our meal, we all joked around and talked as if we haven't met each other for years. I really felt happy, secure, & just blessed. For having friends like them. Alhamdulillah :)

After lunch I told the boys that I was gonna go shop for my cosmetics, and tht i wanted to spend time with Ashiqin. So we said goodbye and went off to sephora again :P I bought my first lipstick! hahaha yes i never wear lipstick and i thought i shuld try something new, i found the perfect one from smashbox! Which costs around 80 bucks. But it was worth it bcause i totally fell in love with it :) Ashiqin bought herself a rosebud salve, which i think the packaging is quite good and heard tht its good quality ;)

And then we were so tired, we found ourselves seats in front of isetan and talked about everything. Especially about how we miss our bestfriends, Nicole, Nahra & Aina. I almost cried thinking about it. I just miss them, I really do.

Me

Me: easily stricken into depression but are not the type to cry over it.

Quote of the day

People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.

If you are honest, people may cheat you. Be honest anyway.

If you feel happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway.

The good you do may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.

Give the world your best and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway.

For you see, in the end, it is between you and God.

It was never between you and them anyway.

Curves!

I had a very productive day! Today I went to curves, a gym located in ampang. I had my first session today since the first time i went there, I only registered myself. I joined curves with my mom bcause we both need some work out and we need something different. The circuit was just hardcore, in a good way I mean.

One thing though. Curves is definitely not a typical traditional gym. And I love that about curves!

For other gym, u go in and u do ur own stuff, choose which one u wanna do, think u shuld do, and all and if u feel tired, well you have to be one tht motivates yrself. And it's hard for people who are not self-motivated.

But in Curves, the trainers there, they will always keep an eye on you, they will make sure you do it properly and make sure u feel like you can achieve more than what you want or more than what u feel u can.

They will not push you like Jillian in the biggest loser but they will give you motivations!

I got something like this "COME ON! U CAN DO IT! THIS IS FOR U TO GET A SEXY BUTT!"

HAHAHA. wellll OKAAYY! :P

They're really friendly, the trainers there. The owner of this franchise is actually a former cbner, she's now 30 something :) And the trainer that was helping me just now was from SBU! or SBS, haha i forgot, either one but she's so nice and pretty! She has this rosy cheeks :D

Anyways, it was a good experience. After finishing 2 rounds , I was very exhausted and its very good. Because the "machines" there, it focuses and it's specially built for every muscle. There's something for the abdomen, the arms, the thighs, the butt, and etc. And I love it. Don't know when else im gonna drop by! But i can't wait for it :)

For you

"...within the core of each of us is the child we once were. This child constitutes the foundation of what we have become, who we are, and what we will be."

- Neuroscientist, Dr. R. Joseph

This quote is for you, H.

Support

Sometimes you're confused between what's best for someone else and whats best for you.

Sometimes you think you know whats best for them, bcause it's written in a common list of best things.

It takes guts and a breakdown of a lot ego to realize that sometimes you don't know whats best for someone else.

I was mixed up. I thought I offered you something that you'd alwys hoped for but i realized that it was nothing close to what you did hope for or wanted. I realize that my pain and yours are two different things.

I wanted something different and you wanted something else too.

But I know now that you needed help and support more than I did.

I can't compare my pain to yours. You went through a lot.

I care about you.

And I've got nothing to lose, by pushing aside my pain and focusing on you. Because I've got my own support, and you don't know how grateful I am to have them. Nobody knows.

Thank you Nicole Chan & Noor Ashiqin :)

"you're awfully nice to people. Not to mention compassionate too. he's lucky to have you as a friend. I'm lucky too :)" - Nicole Chan

I love you sepet nicoleeeeeeee,

I ) < okay tht looks like a number 1 in a bracket o.o

Help

I wish I could help you, I wish I could take some of the burden away. I wish I knew what was best for you. Instead of what was best for me. Im sorry. I'll try to break down the walls around you if I can. I'll try my best to get into your mind. I just need you to trust me.

Fight

I thought you understood me. That night when we fought, I told you everything that you did wrong and I wanted explanations. It was like asking someone what the time was and they replied "im in africa, and i love the wheather here". You had no explanation for what you have done.

You know what I see in you? Lack of energy, lack of effort. I notice it since the start. You had no effort in getting what you want, making people feel better, making them feel special, or even to protect them from getting hurt. You had no effort at all in knowing someone. Yes, you have a great sense of humour. Something that I really love about you. But that's just it, sense of humour. You're not realistic, nor practical.

& I dislike people who don't know how to be serious. I am exasperated by it. I wonder what a person like you would answer to a question like this; what is the meaning of life to you? What would you want to achieve? How can you progress yourself into someone better?

Let me just try to relate the answer with your attitude:

Meaning of life? I dont know! for me to have fun & be happy! :D

Something tht u want to achieve? To have a lot of friends, to lepak with them!

How to progress yrself into someone better? Aren't I good enugh alrdy? ;)

That's how I see you. You have no sense of reality. You think everything is just an illusion & that you are the only thing that is real. Yes i just referred you to a *thing. Are you even a person?

You have no initiative at all to transform yourself into someone better.

Do you have a heart? Do you even have a mind?

A heart to feel and a mind to think. Because I think life for you is like a clown bouncing on fluffy clouds. And I find nothing funny about it.

So tell me why I should give this chance to you? You are a child.

& One of the reasons why I care about people that I care abt is bcause I look up to them.

& I don't think I even look up to you.

Disconnected

I don't knw why but i feel so disconnected to you. I know we dont see each other anymore tht often but i havent seen the others too. But why do i have to feel disconnected to you? I mean you're the closest to me and i was afraid this might happen. I was afraid this side of you would appear more bcause ive seen hints of it bfr. I know myself and i know tht i culdnt accept it. But i keep fighting. I try my hardest. It's hard cz im struggling. To fight for something thts worth it, well worth it for me. I dont know if it is for u, anymore.

Im not trying to be childish nor am i trying to be judgemental again. But this is a strong feeling, and im scared it might eat up our friendship. I don't wanna lose you. I care for you. You don't know how much I love you. You're my sister.